Competition Terms and Conditions You’ll Actually WANT to Read (Hilarious!)

Reading terms and conditions before entering competitions is a necessary evil to make sure you’re eligible and your entry fulfills all requirements. It can be a pretty boring task, but one promoter in Australia recently decided to jazz them up a little bit. It actually makes for a hilarious read. Possibly the first set of T’s & C’s that I’ve read the ENTIRE way through!!

“1. If you enter this Promotion, you agree to give us your right kidney
and naming rights to your children. Just kidding.”

Enjoy it in full below!

WIN A NISSAN GT-R NISMO HOT LAP (“Promotion”)
FIRST THINGS FIRST – CAN YOU ENTER?
You sure can – as long as you are:
(a) human (easy right?);
(b) an Australian resident;
(c) a grown-up – i.e. 18 years or older at the moment of entry (if you
behave like a kid but are over 18 you still qualify);
(d) the holder of a full and valid Australian driver’s licence (sorry,
learner permit and probationary licence drivers are not eligible);
(e) willing to, for safety reasons:
i. wear non-flammable (cotton or wool) long sleeve clothing,
pants and enclosed shoes, and if required, a helmet to be
supplied by the Promoter;
ii. strictly follow the directions of the Promoter’s staff and
representatives at the event;
iii. sign an indemnity form before participating in any
racetrack activities; and
(f) cool about the terms and conditions.
(“Eligible Entrant”)
HOW TO ENTER
It’s pretty easy. Just ensure that you:
(a) complete the entry form available at
http://www.nissan.com.au/NISMOhotlap;
(b) tell us in 25 words or less what NISMO means to you; and
(c) include in your 25 words or less entry submission, the term
“NISMO”
Once you’ve done the above, it’s in our hands. The judges are allpowerful,
they cannot be bribed (not even with cookies) and their
decision is final.
As is always the case, Eligible Entrants must comply with all Facebook
terms of use and our Facebook Community Guidelines – this ensures
that everything remains nice and clean. If you are naughty and don’t
comply you leave us with no choice but to rub you out from being able
to win any prizes.
THE BORING (BUT IMPORTANT) STUFF
1. If you enter this Promotion, you agree to give us your right kidney
and naming rights to your children. Just kidding. You do however
acknowledge and accept the terms and conditions. Interesting
factoid: all information on how to enter, entry instructions,
advertising material and prize information published or otherwise
communicated are considered part of these terms and conditions.
2. Stop reading right now if you are: an employee or director of the
Promoter, an immediate family member of any employee or
director of the Promoter, any retailer, supplier, associated
company or agency of the Promoter, or any market research agency
and any person who the Promoter has previously notified are not
eligible to enter. Sorry but you’ll have to sit this one out.
3. If your entry doesn’t meet the criteria set out here, it won’t be
considered. If your entry is stolen, forged, tampered with,
destroyed by a meteor, mutilated in any other way or lost in
cyberspace, it will be deemed void.
4. Only one entry per person is allowed. You can only enter in your
own name. If you try to trick the system or us by using automated
entry software, mechanical or electronic devices or the wrong
name, we’ll make your entry void. Also, motorsport karma may get
you!
5. Qualification: Entries for the Promotion open at 10.00 am (AEST)
on Wednesday, 4 January 2017 and close at 11.59pm (AEST) on
Thursday, 19 January 2017 (“Promotion Period”). All entries
must be received by the Promoter during the Promotion Period and
in accordance with the conditions of entry. Don’t be late! If you
miss the deadline for any reason whatsoever your entry will turn
into a pumpkin.
6. Judging 101: We’ve placed the heavy burden of judging the
winning entries upon the wise shoulders of representatives of the
Nissan Australia Marketing Team. (“The Judge(s)”).
7. The judging for the prize will take place at 260-270 FrankstonDandenong
Road, Dandenong South, Victoria, 3175, Australia on
Friday, 20 January 2017 at 11.00am. There is no need for you to
turn up – it might get awkward when we don’t let you in. Just
kidding, you can always ask to be part of the judging audience. Just
make sure you bring your motorsport supporters gear and
chanting voice.
8. We recommend putting maximum effort into your entry. This is a
game of skill, not chance. Luck won’t win you any of the prizes, but
an outstanding entry might. All entries will be judged based on the
creativity and originality of your entry, in the humble opinion of our
well-credentialed Judge/s. The Judge’s/s’ decision is final and they
won’t change their minds, even if you cry.
9. All prizes will be awarded to the winning entrants based on the
subjective decision of the Judge/s. The buck stops with them. No
bribes will be accepted.
10. What can I win: Here’s what you could win:
• A hot lap for you in the Nissan GT-R NISMO at Mount
Panorama Circuit on Saturday 4 February 2017.
• A hot lap for your guest in the Nissan GT-R NISMO at Mount
Panorama Circuit on Saturday 4 February 2017.
• Return airfares to Bathurst for two people from your closest
capital city. Depart Friday 3rd February
• A transfer for two people from Bathurst airport to hotel
• Three night’s accommodation in Bathurst, 1 x twin share
room.
• 2 x corporate hospitality passes for Saturday 4 February and
Sunday 5 February
• A transfer for two people from hotel to Bathurst airport
11. Tell me more: The individual prize value for this experience is
difficult to determine – it really is a money cannot buy experience.
With a little searching around we have placed the maximum total
prize value at $8,900.
12. We can’t exchange, swap or transfer the prize(s) or any unused
portion, or give you cash instead. Prize values are in Australian
dollars and are the recommended retail value and are correct at
time of printing. We can’t be held responsible if the prize value
changes afterwards. To the extent permitted by law, the Promoter
makes no representations or warranties as to the quality,
suitability, or merchantability of the prize(s).
13. Big brother is watching you: The prize(s) cannot be sold,
scalped, auctioned, raffled, pledged, or promoted as an incentive or
reward by you or anyone you get to do so. We don’t what to find
out that you have the prize(s) for sale on e-bay or Gumtree or
anywhere else for that matter. If you don’t turn up at your
nominated event, whoever has the ticket won’t be allowed in!
14. We’ll hunt down our Winner and give them the good news by
emailing them or giving them a call.
15. We’ll also explain how to collect the prizes or arrange delivery. We
will crack our whips and try our hardest to deliver notification of
the prizes to the Prize Winners by above dates by telephone and
email.
16. Unfortunately, we can’t control everything. If the prize(s) is/are
unavailable for reasons beyond our control, we’ll be deeply sorry,
but we can’t be held liable.
17. If we can’t track down the Prize Winners despite making all
reasonable effort to do so, or if the winners don’t claim their prize
by the time we specify, then the prizes or elements of the prizes will
be forfeited. No, you won’t get a wad of cash instead. Our judges
may judge another winner or winners to redistribute any
remaining prizes. We reserve the right not to give out a prize if we
don’t believe we can find a suitable Prize Winner.
18. This Promotion is in no way sponsored, endorsed or administered
by Facebook. Any information provided by an entrant is provided
2
to us and not to Facebook. Entrants release Facebook from all
liability in relation to this Promotion.
19. Your entry isn’t considered accepted until we receive it – no matter
when you send or submit it. Incomplete, inaudible, indecipherable
or incomprehensible entries will be chucked in the trash.
20. The Promoter may take photographs and videos of you and/or
your entry. They might be artistic. If your entry is really amazing,
we might even take a few selfies with it or use it in our promotions.
21. By entering this Promotion, you:
(a) consent to us using your personal details (name, likeness,
image and/or voice); and
(b) agree to media exposure for the purpose of any future
promotional, marketing, advertising or publicity (in any
media) of our choice for an unlimited period without
remuneration or other compensation.
22. We may at any time decide to verify the validity of entries and
entrants (including an entrant’s identity, age and place of
residence) and we reserve the right to disqualify any entrant who
hasn’t played by the rules or who has tampered with the entry
process. Proof of identification, age, residency and entry
considered suitable for verification is at the discretion of us and we
may seek to get the FBI involved. If it’s a genuine error or omission,
we may still accept your entry. Failure by us to enforce any of our
rights at any stage does not constitute a waiver of those rights –
that is we get to decide what we do.
23. The Promoter, its associated agencies and companies associated
with this Promotion will take no responsibility for prize(s)
damaged or lost in transit. Once the prize(s) has/have left the
premises of the Promoter, the Promoter’s associated agencies or
the companies associated with this Promotion, the Promoter, the
Promoter’s associated agencies and the companies associated with
this Promotion will not be responsible for any delay, failure to
deliver, or damage caused to the prize(s) during transit.
24. If we think you’re not in the mental or physical condition necessary
to safely participate in the prize(s), we reserve the right to stop you
from taking part in any or all aspects of the prize(s).
25. It is a condition of accepting the prize that you must comply with
all the conditions of use of the prize and the prize supplier’s
requirements. Play by the rules, kids!
26. If you break the rules, you may get the boot. If we believe any
individual has breached any of our terms and conditions, or
engaged in any unlawful or improper misconduct that might
jeopardise the Promotion, we won’t hesitate to disqualify them. We
may lawfully (you know it is serious business when the word
lawfully is used) seek damages or other compensation from any
offender(s). Failure to enforce any of our rights at any stage doesn’t
mean we waive those rights.
27. If the proverbial hits the fan, the Promotion may be cancelled or
changed. In the event:
(a) of unforeseen circumstances, alien invasion, zombie attack,
war, terrorism, state of emergency or disaster (including but
not limited to natural disaster);
(b) that this Promotion is interfered with in any way or is not
capable of being conducted as reasonably anticipated due to
any reason beyond the reasonable control of the Promoter;
We reserve the right, in our sole discretion, to the fullest extent
permitted by law, and subject to any written directions from a
regulatory authority, to modify, suspend, terminate or cancel the
Promotion as appropriate.
28. If entering or winning this Promotion causes you to suffer any
loss, financial or otherwise, that’s unfortunate, but not our
responsibility. To the full extent permitted by law, the Promoter,
the Promoter’s officers, employees and agents, the Promoter’s
related companies and all those entities’ personnel exclude all
liability for any loss (including any damage, claim, injury, cost or
expense, including loss of opportunity) which is suffered or
incurred by any individual in connection with the Promotion or
prizes, including but not limited to: (i) any technical difficulties or
equipment malfunction (whether or not under the Promoter’s
control); (ii) any theft, unauthorised access or third party
interference; (iii) any entry or prize claim that is late, lost, altered,
damaged or misdirected (whether or not after their receipt by the
Promoter) due to any reason beyond the reasonable control of the
Promoter; (iv) any variation in prize value to that stated in these
terms and conditions; (v) any tax liability incurred by the Prize
Winner or entrant; (vi) any prize(s); or participation in or use of
any prize(s); (vii) any direct, indirect, economic or consequential
loss; (viii) any loss arising from negligence; (ix) any liability for
personal injury or death. Nothing in these conditions limit,
exclude or modify or purports to limit, exclude or modify the
statutory consumer guarantees as provided under the
Competition and Consumer Act 2010 (Cth), as well as any other
implied warranties under the Australian Securities and
Investment Commission Act 2001 or similar consumer protection
laws in the States and Territories of Australia.
29. By entering this Promotion, you consent to us using your
personal details (including name, likeness, image and/or voice)
for any marketing and advertising (in any form of media) of our
choice for an unlimited period without paying you any cash-o-la
forever, unless you tell us otherwise very clearly when you accept
your prize.
30. Your entry and entry details become our property. Sorry, we can’t
return your entry (even if you send us a stamped envelope). By
entering the promotion, unless you tell us otherwise, you consent
to us using your personal information for running the Promotion,
awarding prizes and getting tattoos in your honour. We’ll only
share your information with our related entities and contractors
for the above purposes. The winner’s(s’) personal information
may be disclosed to State and Territory lottery departments as
required by law. You can ask us to access the personal
information we hold about you and request that corrections be
made to it – but only where such correction requests are
legitimate.
31. The Promotion is conducted by the generous folk at Nissan Motor
Co. (Australia) Pty Ltd., ACN 004 663 156, of 260-270 Frankston
Dandenong Road, Dandenong South, Victoria 3175,
http://www.nissan.com.au / 03 9797 4111 (“Promoter”).
32. If you want to know the nitty gritty details of what we do with
your personal information, how you can access or correct the
information we hold about you, who we’ll share it with overseas,
how you can make a privacy related complaint and how we’ll deal
with your complaint, you can read all about it in our Nissan
Privacy Policy, available at http://www.nissan.com.au

If only they were this fun to read ALL the time!

Kezza.

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